Every Class is Curved

As a transition into the academic world in preparation of the P-T Theorem, I will propose one of my most obvious theorems.

Theorem 4: Every Class is Curved

As far as I'm concerned, every class is curved in one way or another, but not by the true meaning of a curve. A curve is anything that alters the grades of a test, and no teacher can reasonably create a class grade without a curve. There is no reasonable way to claim that a person knows 93% of the material, and therefore should get an A.

A curve can come in almost infinite number of forms. The most obvious form is an official "7 point curve" on a test for everyone, but there are other ways. Simply making a test harder or easier is a curve. Simply making a test shorter or longer, thereby forcing a student to work faster or slower, is a way of creating a curve. A teacher can put a million questions on a test, curving the test to about a .01%, then call that an A (or a C-). There is no way to avoid a curve.

Possibly the most curved grades of all are the ones not related to a "test." Every paper is curved to a certain average grade or standard. Furthermore, every curve is different for every person in the class due to the incredible arbitrariness of paper-grading.

Art projects are the most obviously curved grades, for by saying you got an B+, you are not saying that over 87% of the molecules of paint are in the correct location, but rather that you have a certain relation to the other projects in the class. This curve is also arbitrary.

So no matter how hard the test is, always be thankful of the curve. Because without the curve, your grade could literally be anything.

Stay Tuned: Next Post will be "Why Geisman's arguments are completely useless and annoying: an intense analysis of his self-proclaimed expertise with semantics"