Old People

I try to come up with something to write about as often as I can, but sometimes it is difficult. However, it motivates me to realize things and notice patterns that I probably would not otherwise realize and notice. One of these is that old people struggle mightily with pronunciation. Now I will admit I do not have a large sample of data to back up this realization, and although I am tempted to take the fact that my parents can't pronounce words and generalize it into a theorem that all old people can't pronounce words, I will leave it as simply a proposition. And for the record, I consider old to be 48 and older, just so that my parents narrowly make the cut.

Proposition: Old people struggle with pronunciation

The best example of this is the word sudoku. I understand it is an Asian word and that may make it seem intimidating to the elderly, but both my parents do sodukos (well, attempt them...) pretty much every day and so for them, the word is commonplace. However, they insist on calling it "suduku" (with an "ew" sound as the middle syllable). Even when it is written in front of them, they disregard the letters on the page and pronounce the word their own way. I tell them to sound it out and even repeat after me, but sure enough, the next day they change that vowel to a U and I have to start the lesson all over again.

My mom especially has trouble with pronouncing "Texas Hold'em," and there is absolutely no excuse of a language barrier here. It even has "Texas," arguably the most American state of all the states, in its name. I could possibly see how the hick-style contraction of "Hold'em" might throw her off a bit, but no. She insists on calling it Texem Hold'em. ("Hey you should teach me that game you boys play, what is it...Tex-uh....Tex'em Hold'em!" "Sorry mom, I've never heard of that game"). I have tried to understand what causes this mix-up and I can only conclude that the elderly tend to err on the side of repeated sounds (su-doo-koo, Tex'em Hold'em) which is why they have no trouble with rhyming words or words like banana.

Sometimes I think they just don't try. Like with this one woman who asked me if I ever listen to Seerus. I had no idea what she was talking about and didn't even consider the fact that she was actually mispronouncing the word Sirius (Satellite Radio). And she didn't even use a questioning/unsure tone that would indicate that she knew that maybe she was not pronouncing it quite correctly. But no, she wanted to know, with an utmost confidence in herself, if I listened to Seerus. Are you serious woman?

I can't decide if I prefer someone to give a stab at a word and end up butchering it to jibberish, or if it is better to start a word very cautiously, hoping ESP kicks in and someone can finish it for you. There is no doubt both are annoying when they are overused, but I think I prefer the first. At least you are trying. Aim for the stars and land among the clouds is what I always say. I also say that the greatest risk is not taking one. But it really helps if you get a few syllables right...

As for the other option, ESP sometimes is quite effective. For example, if my mom is talking about basketball and starts a word with "Zuh" or "Ill" I know she is talking about Zydrunas Ilgauskas. She doesn't need to even mention the Cavs or NBA, I know she is never going to get the whole name on her own nor do I want her to try. It will only lead to frustration for all parties involved.

Sometimes, my mom will combine both strategies, which also has its place. For example, when she is talking about baseball, and she mentions Cabrera, I know that she could mean any Latino name beginning with a C (Cordova, Cordero, etc.). I mentally expand my search and usually am able to come up with the person she is talking about. As long as I keep her knowledge of sports to one or two teams per sport, this strategy is effective.

Anyway, I come across examples like these all the time and unfortunately I think this is a problem that is unfixable. I do my best to educate the elderly, but they always revert to their old ways.